I'm not a hater. I'm a realist. I keep trying to convince others there's an actual difference. Let me give you an example - forget drinking a black cold brew coffee- drink an espresso. An espresso? Bitter AF. Don't tell me you taste the floral chocolatey notes cause I'm gonna look at you like "uh huh...what else can you taste on your palette that is crying because the bitterness just killed it all?" Now don't get me wrong, I love espresso. Order it aaalll the time. I like the bitter taste. Pour it well - very rare - and it actually tastes "nice." Give me some sparkling water and a little almond cookie on the side (smack mouth as if to say "magnifique") Bougie? Nah. Just sometimes I need a gasoline kick of caffeine. Like a simple shot of Tequila. No ice. No salt. No facial expressions either. Life has come to this my friends.
I'm not a hater. I'm a realist.
Jalapeno Kiwi Cucumber Kombucha. Sounds yummy? Hold that thought.
Our cold brew coffee was just reviewed and this is what the critic said
"The coffee, which is certainly going to be where the majority of the initial demand will be, is quite good, but, much like other upstart cold brew companies, doesn't have an obvious point of differentiation to the liquid. There's something about their label that feels disjointed, all of the visual elements feel like their own little islands versus one cohesive message. We appreciate their efforts."
Now, I swallowed it. Bitter AF. (would've preferred an espresso from a dirty greasy diner any day) Would've never had a problem until i read this same critic do a review on the above mentioned. Jalapeno. Kiwi. Cucumber. Kombucha. Here's what they said about them:
"The pairing of all these flavors results in a drink that's complex, balanced, and quite addictive. There's just enough of each flavor to make you want to go back again and again for another sip. On the packaging and branding, given that all three of the flavour ingredients are green, this seems like an intuitive approach, it's nicely organized and easy to read, the execution is really top-notch."
All I'm asking, world, is that in the beverage industry we say it like it is. I'm not hating on other cold brews or kombucha. The more, the absolute merrier, for craft beverages. If you think our cold brew is wack, cool, say it. But stay in character man. Cause if you step out of your costume, i'm calling it out. Don't worry i'll give you a free room in hater hotel, cause that's where all the haters sleep.
Don't drink the Hater-Aid guys.
DRINK COLD BREW COFFEE